


MadArcher : Loopy

by iWriteGayShite



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Adventure & Romance, Angst and Feels, Canon Gay Relationship, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Once Upon a Time (TV) References, madarcher curiousarcher
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-11-05 13:13:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17919449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iWriteGayShite/pseuds/iWriteGayShite
Summary: Extremely loosely based on Alice and Robin from the seventh season of Once upon a time.I am not a part of that fandom I just adore the concept of their relationship and wanted to create a story.Lots of fluff and angst, they travel realms so you will see them in places like wonderland and the modern world etc, so hopefully it's enjoyable.This is purely my own creative outlet so please just let me know what you think if you do decide to read.





	1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Alice held her breath, walking backwards as if in slow motion, whipping her head around all angles silently, hoping her attacker had not managed to sniff out her whereabouts just yet. There was a rustling noise from above, causing Alice to jump back slightly with the sound of a twig snapping beneath her feet echoing coldly off of the trees. She froze in place - not being able to hold back her cringe, ducking her head.

She waited.

Nothing.

She waited a moment more.

Still, nothing.

Thinking herself silly to be even worrying about such a sound in the woods anyway, she lifted one mud covered boot in an attempt to step forward. Before said boot had even reached the ground, a whisper of wind flew past her ear, pinning the cloth covering her shoulder to the tree behind. She looked up to see an arrow placed in perfect position and followed its path upwards.

Eyes connecting with her attacker, Alice broke into a wide grin.

“Well that’s no fair is it? That’s cheating”

“It’s hardly cheating, think of it as strategic movement”

“My boots gonna make a strategic movement right up your arsehole” Alice mumbled, but smiled nonetheless.

“Well? Are you gonna scale your way down here and un-pin me from this tree before me dress rips or what? Its getting dark”

Robin laughed loudly, but placed her bow back in place, securing it onto her back before beginning her descent. The earthy tones of her hunting attire made her nearly impossible to see, and the light way she treaded any surface in her rough boots meant that she was almost impossible to hear too. Being the exact opposite to Alice, it always made for a good chase. It was something they enjoyed doing on hazy summer evenings, or lazy Sundays where there was nothing better to do. Today was just that day, a chill Sunday afternoon. Not a breeze in sight with the sun shining brightly from above. It was hot for spring, Robin had mentioned, causing Alice to break into her signature wicked grin, daring Robin to catch her. It was just something to do that benefitted both their fitness and their skills, with Alice learning faster ways to control her magic, and Robin using it as a chance at on the run target practice. Never had Robin actually hit Alice directly with her arrow for fear of killing the girl, but one to many times Alice had drifted down her rabbit hole to wonderland, leaving a very confused Robin to wander the forest for hours on end, bow and arrow pent up for launch between her fingertips. Today though, Robin had caught her before she had a chance to use her magic.

Speaking of Alice, the girl had disappeared from where she had been stuck to the tree. Robin landed lightly on the damp leaves below, and looked around for a moment, slightly bewildered. It seemed Alice had taken off, and so had her arrow – Robin didn’t know which one she was more worried about losing.

Deciding that standing around wasn’t going to be much use, Robin walked towards the tree Alice had just vanished from in front of, intending to peer around the back and see if Alice was just simply hiding there to scare her. However, as she approached she was met with a slight dusting of dried mud. It landed on top of her head like heavy snowfall

. “What the-“ she spoke as she glanced upwards, her eyes instantly being met with Alice’s light blue underwear. Laughing loudly, she looked away blushing and asked Alice what on earth she was doing.

“Well, you see my love. I thought I’d give it a go and leg it up the tree while you were distracted, so then I could surprise attack you. But I definitely misjudged the height of this thing, and being locked in a tower most of your life means being stuck anywhere high off the ground is a big no from me. And you see I thought of all this as I was climbin, so I stopped, but my foot slipped, and now I’m kinda hanging on with my chicken arms. But see now I’m losing grip and I’m panicking, will I ever-“

“Alice, stop! please!” Robin laughed lightly, growing confused by Alice’s rambling. “I’ll help you down if you jus-“ Robin’s words died in her throat as Alice and her light blue underwear came crashing down on top of her unexpecting body, dragging a few branches along with it.

Robin tried to catch her, her muscles reasonably strong from hunting, but she failed to keep her legs upright, ending in Robin flat on her back and Alice sprawled out every which way across her body.

“I certainly won’t be clapping the pilot for that landing ay robs?” Alice said cheekily, but she wore bright red cheeks and a very sheepish grin. Robin shoved her playfully as she stood up, wiping any of natures floor from her clothing as she looked towards the sky, noting the purple colour beginning to form.

“Guess we should start heading back” said Alice, following her train of thought. It’s funny how Alice could do that, she could almost always tell what Robin was thinking, sometimes even before Robin knew it herself. She was good at judging people and their character but was often laughed at for her quirky way of analysing people or situations. Robin thought it was one of the most lovable things about her.

Realising she was staring at an ever darkening sky, she turned and instinctively grabbed Alice’s hand as they tiredly made their way back home.

“Ya know” started Alice after a few minutes of silent walking had passed “I think I’m getting a bruise on my right butt cheek”

Robin, so lost in thought and so ill prepared for that sentence, laughed loudly, screeching and snorting her way up the path. Alice looked like a deer in headlights, ‘Is this how bloody insane I look to most people?’ she thought to herself before freeing her hand from Robin’s and swatting her on the arm.

“Ay!! Its not funny Robin it hurts, maybe I shouldn’t try climbing trees in a dress” She pouted, re-joining their hands and swinging lightly between them. “Oh I don’t know about that” Robin smirked, “from where I was standing, you climbing in a dress was the stuff of dreams”

“Ew pervert! Keep it in your pants!” Robin laughed as they made their way into camp. The darkness had taken over the sky by now, but neither girl could care less enough to notice.

****************************

A loud banging on the solid wooden door of Robin’s bedroom caused her to wake the following morning. Accepting most things as a threat, she crept out of bed in an agile haste, grabbing her emergency dagger and facing it towards the entrance with an outstretched arm. It wasn’t her mother, for she would never knock no matter what condition Robin was in, and It definitely wasn’t Alice, because Alice would bound through the door like an over excited puppy. Still in her white undergarments consisting of a tight vest and leggings, too tired the night previous to undress properly before falling asleep atop the sheep skin blanket, she called out in an even tone:

“Who is it?”

“Uh… Killian?”

Killian? Now that was weird. Why hadn’t her mother accompanied him, had her mother even let him in? She crossed the room and opened the door to find him leaning awkwardly against the doorframe. He leapt back slightly but regained composure as quick as he had lost it. He had a strange expression on his face, like he was about to laugh, cry, or vomit. It only made her more worried.

“Oh hey, Robin” he half stuttered as he made an attempt to smile, he failed miserably.

“What’s wrong? Where’s my mother? Is Alice okay? Oh my god what happened to Alice? Is this from that bruise on her ass because I TRIED to catch her bu-“

“Bruise, what? Robin. Hold on, I can explain. Alice is fine” he laughed lightly, Robin watched his eyes as his expression changed, he looked more relaxed now. She let out aa breath and waited for him to speak.

“Your mother is out on her horse, she told me I could come in and wake you, I hope you don’t mind. I’m actually here on business. It’s quite urgent and I needed to speak with you somewhere nobody could over hear. I know Zelena has this place bubble wrapped in protective magic” he laughed again. “Shall we sit in the kitchen?” He proposed as he jutted his thumb over his shoulder, raising both his eyebrows in a way that reminded her of Alice.

“Yes of course, just give me a few minutes to get dressed, help yourself to anything in the kitchen” He leant over the threshold and gave her a quick squeeze before turning towards the desired room.

Changing into her hunting gear and plaiting her braid intricately to one side, Robin soon followed after Killian, entering the kitchen to find him struggling with a steel pot over the fire stove. Robin chuckled lowly and walked over to help, taking it from his hands and speaking to his very much frustrated looking features “It’s a finicky old thing, my mother tried to charm it once but she only made it worse. Now if you leave it on for more than 3 minutes it screams like a cat and overflows.” She set the pot over the fire and took a seat at the table across from him. He had pulled out a large map and a scroll, rolling the quill between his fingers as he focused for a moment.

“Okay, so. There’s been a major issue brought to my attention recently and I believe I have found a way to solve it. I’ve been up all night. Its big big” his voice sounded gravelly and he coughed before continuing. “There’s a problem with three of our main portals, they have some blockage on the other side. People can get from our realm in but cannot get back out and get here smoothly. They have to go through other realms, it took Old John ten weeks to get back from modern earth, he arrived among others yesterday morning to alert me to the problems. I thought it was a technical issue but it’s not. I also thought it was an energy issue, as in now our magic or magic utilities are not strong enough, but it isn’t that either”

Robin pursed her lips in thought, staring at the marks on the map. “Could it be an issue with the portal placement, these worlds are forever evolving and changing just like ours?” she spoke, trying to decipher Killian’s writing.

Killian grinned, “Clever girl! That’s what I’ve gathered from the evidence anyways. I have a loose plan here but I need your input considering it’s you and Alice I plan on sending”

He gave her a pointed look, as if expecting her to throw the map at him in anguish, but she simply smiled, and to his surprise, blushed. “Wow hook I’m honoured. You really trust me with this? And Alice? You’d let her be exposed to such dangers like that?”

He placed his quill on the table and clasped his hands together, leaning forward with a rare glint in his eye. In a hushed tone he spoke “Look Robin, I’m gonna be honest, you have a very specific intelligence, and you are also very highly skilled in combat with or without that arrow. You’re the only one I trust to do this safely. It’s not the most dangerous mission but it is not easy and will require as much brain power as physical strength and you my dear, have both.” He seemed pleased with himself before a rather concerned expression forced it’s way onto his face, with his eyebrows pinched tight he finished “And with regards to Alice, she has travelled much after her life in that tower, and she would love the opportunity to travel realms with you. She says it all the time! Besides that, she’s ridiculously intuitive and you both balance each other out. She has a very useful, albeit crazy, perspective that you will definitely need. So, I put my fatherly feelings aside and decided upon the both of you”

Robin sat back in her chair and rolled her shoulders out. She took a few moments to process before saying “Well, we best get organized then?”

**************************

Alice loved her job, really. She loved making things for people that put a smile on their face, and that’s exactly what her market stall did. She was hired by Mrs. Bigalow many months ago to help sell her assortment of fresh baked goods, but upon discovering Alice’s talent for weavings and sowing, they now sold beautiful bracelets and hairbands and the like for the young children of the town. Alice was a natural sales woman. Not one person could ever hate her, and she always suckered in a few unsure customers on a great bargain sale, even suggesting the idea of walking around town giving out free samples. “To get the buzz going!” she had shouted at Mrs. Bigalow excitedly one day, and Mrs. B hadn’t got the heart to tell her no, besides, Alice was right.

Today was going by like any other, the usual lunch time rush was beginning to die down and Mrs. B had excused herself for a few hours, her back was injured during a carriage ride that went badly a few months prior and she was struggling to work full days anymore – it’s part of the reason she hired Alice in the first place. Trusting Alice to keep everything safe and under control as she headed off home, leaving Alice to grab a stool and sit in front of the stall, shouting every once in a while to advertise her product.

Thinking it quiet enough, Alice relaxed into her seat for a moment before she was disturbed by a deep voice calling her name from across the way. Alice watched as he came in to view and she grimaced before whacking the most shit eating grin onto her features as she could manage.

“Hi there, Tommon, you doin’ alright? You wanna loaf? How bout a sweet one today ay?” she asked lightly. She noted that he was with a friend who’s name was lost on her, but she remembered him to be a quiet enough boy around the village. She couldn’t say the same for Tommon however, as he bounded towards her like a monkey, all swaying limbs and greasy hair.

“Did you make that loaf?” he asked as he approached, with a weird smirk plastered across his face.

“No, this was all Mrs. B, she made it fresh this morning just for you Tommon!” she added, forcing her smile to stay put. Completely ignoring what she had just said, he towered above her and made a comment that made her blood boil instantly. “Where’s that pretty little lady you hang around with ay Alice? She in town today?”

“That pretty little lady, is not so little, and her name is robin. But no, she’s not in town”

“That’s a pity, I would have liked to see her today, it’s so lovely out, maybe she could accompany me to the pond” He spoke in a sickly sweet manner that turned Alice inside out with the creeps.

“Yeah well, she’s out on business. She’s got better things to do all day than feed the bloody ducks Tommon” Alice bit harshly, but kept her body calm, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.

“I’m sure she’s got better thing to do than spend her free time with a nutter like you, yet she does it anyway, so who’s to know?” He smiled in victory at the way Alice’s face fell. Feeling as though he hit the mark.

Alice closed her eyes for a split second before opening them and forcing yet another smile across her torn features. “Do you want something or not man because I’ve got work to be doing, no time to chat!”

“No thanks Alice, I wouldn’t wanna catch the crazy” suddenly the unnamed friend laughed, giving Tommon an even bigger ego boost as he strolled away muttering “loopy old nut”

Alice sat down, feeling deflated. She pretended those comments didn’t hurt her, she acted as if it didn’t make her stomach flip unnervingly every time someone called her ‘crazy Alice’, even if meant in an endearing way. The truth was, she was a bit loopy, but the people closest to her understood her, and understood why she was the way she was. Robin made her feel so confident in herself that she almost felt disappointed when her feelings got hurt. Sometimes she used her crazy personality to her advantage, a type of defence mechanism. But Robin could always see right through it.

She could forget about all her worries for now, forget about missing Robin as she spoke confidently to the villagers as they passed by. The stall was a beautiful distraction from the hardships she had faced once before in her life, but she longed for more. More adventure!

With a quick sigh, she stood from her stool and smiled politely as a customer approached her stall.

“Afternoon ma’am, bet you could smell our lavender loaf down the street, it’s our new experiment. Would you like to try some?”

**************************

That evening as Killian had finally decided he was satisfied with their progress, Alice had knocked on the front door to Robins cottage. It was a very small cottage on a large piece of land that Robins father had owned, and her and her mother had really come to love the privacy and serenity of it all.

Killian opened the door for her and laughed at her shocked expression.

“Um, hi, papa, I was on my way home when I uh, went the wrong way?” she offered lamely. Alice was supposed to be at their home by now after work, as she knew how much Killian hated her walking through Huckleberry Lane alone in the darkness. He gave her a look but was too distracted by her basket of oddly shaped breads to say any more, his stomach screaming for some food. It was only now that Robin noticed they had survived purely on strong coffee all day. Relighting the fire for some warmth, she finally made her way over to Alice, taking the basket graciously and lightly pecking her cheek. Both girls eyes lit up at the sight of one another, but Robin missed the slight slump of Alice’s shoulders as she entered the building, something she would have noticed if she hadn’t been so drained and distracted herself.

“What? What is this?” Killian screeched, looking hysterically offended. “Alice is a darling, she brings us home any of the messed up batches from work every evening” Zelena offered, walking into the room and cherishing any excuse to torment Alice’s father.

“Sorry Papa” Alice said weakly, taking a seat next to Robin. Robin removed Alice’s cloak and watched as Zelena pushed Hook towards the door.

“I won’t be home tonight papa!” Alice shouted as he threw a quick wave over his shoulder and marched along the stony path, big loaf of oddly shaped, half burned bread in hand. Robin laughed as Zelena retired to her chambers for the night, only simply asking the girls keep their voices down to which they agreed easily, both exhausted themselves from their busy day, as they too sluggishly made their way down the hall where robin’s bedroom lay still untouched from this morning – minus the dagger, which was thrown haphazardly on to the dressing table.

Stripping down to their underwear and climbing under the sheets, Robin pecked Alice on the forehead before whispering “I have so much to tell you but I’m far too tired tonight, are you free tomorrow?”

Either already asleep or too tired to answer, Alice returned a small grunt and snuggled close into Robins chest, both girls falling asleep instantly, with dreams of lavender loaves and magic portals swimming in their minds.


	2. 2 Arrows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of my story.

**2 arrows**

Alice was awoken abruptly by the rain battering violently against the window and high ceiling of Robin’s bedroom. Despite the room being painted in pools of dark grey, she knew that it was early morning. She blew a strand of Robins loose hair from her face and untangled their legs, her body already missing the warmth they had created beneath the covers. Moving slowly, Alice sat up to get a better view of the window pane, surprised to see nothing but rain obscuring her view of Robin’s farm that sat just beyond the cottage.

Alice loved the rain, it made her imagine such wonderful things in her mind like tiny elephants marching through the sky, it also reminded her that Mrs. B would not be opening her stall today as bread and rain didn’t mix, and so she had the day off. Alice enjoyed the rain, unlike Robin who seen it as nothing more than a hindrance to her hunting. However, as a bright flash of white stunned her surroundings, Alice quickly remembered that she does not in fact, under any circumstance, enjoy thunder and lightning. Jumping quickly as if someone had shoved Robin’s dagger into her ass cheek, Alice leapt from the bed and spun in a strange, dazed circle. Her hair sticking up in all angles as if she had already been genuinely shocked by the lightening itself. Thunder rumbled lowly above the house and began growing louder and louder as Alice sat in the middle of the floor and covered her ears with her hands, squealing passionately with her eyes shut.

Confused and freshly awake, Robin leapt from the bed with the sheepskin wrapped around her shoulders.

“Ali-“ she yelped in a high pitch tone, her words coming to a rough halt as she ran directly into Alice, barely catching herself on her dresser as her eyes finally began to focus.

“Alice?” she panted, as she stared down at her girlfriend, who wore the expression of a sick pug.

“What the fuck are you doing down there?” Robin asked curiously as she attempted to untangle herself from the blanket. Being too distracted with a screeching Alice, Robin hadn’t yet noticed the weather and so she jumped unnervingly along with Alice as another set of loud thunderous roars erupted overhead.

Composing herself quickly, she knelt down to help Alice off of the cold floor, noting the goose bumps forming along the other girl’s body.

Alice on the other hand refused to budge. “Excuse me my love, but the sky is hungry, it’s tummy has been rumbling all morning, and I don’t intend on being swept away and eaten”

Robin chuckled lightly at the curious description and lowered herself beside Alice, wrapping the sheepskin around them both being fully aware that Alice and her fear of thunderstorms was no joke. Alice leaned towards Robin subconsciously and Robin gave her a warm hug, both still clad in nothing but underwear.

“It’s very noisy isn’t it? Could you ask the clouds to shut up” Alice mumbled, looking at Robin and giving a cheeky side wards grin. Laughing, Robin gave Alice a quick kiss and leant in close, whispering “Ya know, there’s something we could do to distract ourselves, and with the rain and thunder, nobody would hear us back here”

Alice stared at her inquisitively before the realisation dawned on her.

“Oh, right, yes. Well Robs, thank god we slept in our underwear, now half the works done and we can get straight to it! Like animals” she growled, thankful for Robin’s attempt at distracting her from the weather outside.

As the wind howled around the small cottage, Alice wrapped her arms around Robin’s neck and kissed her slowly.

                                                                 

                                                            **********************

Not a mere 10 minutes later had the wind and rain picked up considerably, sending a chill down Killian’s spine as he wandered drenched into Robin and Zelena’s farm. His clothes clung to his body as he marched towards the door, almost forgetting to knock in his excitement.

Down the back of the cottage, the small room of Robin’s was no longer cold. The heat radiating from both girls in the bed had almost steamed up the window, and giggles could be deciphered through soft moans.

Killian knocked aggressively as Zelena rushed to the door, allowing him to enter immediately while shoving a large piece of cloth at his face to dry off.

“What in heavens name are you doing out in this weather? Surely you didn’t miss Alice that much, you know she’s safe here”

“Hey no, its not- I need to speak to robin!” He half yelled as he jogged towards the back of the house.

“Make sure to knock Killian!” Zelena said loudly, rolling her eyes and following him down the hall.

Not being able to hear anything but the rain and each other, wrapped in their own world of heated bodies and rough kisses, they had no idea that Alice’s father was bounding down the hall towards the room they accompanied.

Killian reached the door and completely forgetting himself in his haste to tell Robin the news, burst through the door with Zelena hot on his heels, warning him to slow down. Swinging into the room like a hive of bees had just exploded inside his jacket and dripping onto Robin’s new embroidered rug, he yelled “Robin!!!  You’ll never guess wha-“

“FUCKING HELL” Robin screamed hysterically as Alice was shoved unceremoniously from on top of Robins waist. Killian watched horrified, frozen in place as Alice scrambled butt naked from the floor wrapped in the blanket, leaving a very flustered Robin to roll onto the other side of the floor beside the bed, shielded from sight.

“WHAT THE HELL PAPA? WHAT ARE YOU DOING????” Alice screeched, her face a bright red as she checked that she was completely covered.

Killian had already backed away from the door and closed it quickly, turning to look at a rather amused Zelena.

“Uh, oh my dears I am so sorry! I wasn’t even thinking abou-“

“I WANT TO DIE” robin shrieked, and Killian eased upon hearing Alice’s muffled laughter through the thick wood of the door.

“I am very sorry for interrupting ..but I-Robin I have some very interesting news about the mission and I just couldn’t wait. Could you please come out soon…I promise I am more embarrassed than you are”

Alice gave Robin a questioning look from the floor as Robin rose to her feet, promising to explain soon as she threw on her underwear and told Killian she would be out as soon as possible.

 Leaving towards the living room, Zelena firmly whacked Killian across the back off his soaked hair.

“I bloody told you to knock!” she exclaimed, shaking her head but unable to hide a small smile from her lips.

                                                             ************************

Dressed in her hunting gear of brown trousers, green shirt and brown vest, along with dark beige wool socks to wear beneath her boots, Robin left Alice to get dressed in her room as she walked towards the lounge area where Killian and Zelena were sitting across from the fire. Both with hands cupped around a steamy mug of something. Avoiding eye contact, Robin entered and sat on the floor next to the fire just as Alice entered, running her fingers through her wild hair as her dress swooshed gently across the wooden floor. She sat on Robin’s favourite chair which was – not so coincidentally – the furthest away from Robin. Both girls wore bright pink cheeks as Zelena cleared her throat against the silence.

“Well then, I believe you three have much to discuss” she said gleefully, winking at Robin before leaving the room. Robin watched as Alice took on a rather petrified expression, clearly taking her mother to mean that they were going to have a very different discussion and she had to stop herself from laughing at her girlfriend who rarely got anxious about anything.

It was Killian who spoke first, breaking the awkward tension with a wide smile, he was all teeth and gleaming eyes.

“Alice darling, I promise to explain everything soon but for now just listen carefully”

Alice mumbled “yeah that’s what everyone keeps saying” before he turned to Robin, a look of light crossing his face.

“After making many visits I managed to find an old friend who owed me a favour, he has given me the most beautiful enchanted ring. It will act as your key to all portals!”

Robin leapt to her feet in surprise, sticking her hands out in such an odd motion that Alice had to resist the urge to flinch from the other side of the room. “What? That’s amazing! And so soon! I told you this was possible, thank god we have everything planned out. This is perfect!”

“Isn’t it?” Killian asked, looking as amazed as Robin felt. “We have the missing puzzle piece, now all that’s left to do is…” and at his words, both Killian and Robin turned to Alice who sat playing with a loose thread at the end of her skirt. She looked up and smiled sheepishly, “What in Lords name are you both looking at?” she asked innocently.

                                                                       ***************

“Oh fuck off, no way!” Alice screeched, jumping on top of robin and wrapping every limb around her torso and neck. Zelena and Killian stood beside them, only too thrilled to see Alice look so genuinely happy. “We’re going on our own adventure” Alice whispered excitedly so that only Robin could hear. The embarrassing events of the morning had been long forgotten as Killian had, with much apprehension and delight, informed Alice of what him and Robin would be doing for their village.

With the stormy weather persisting and only getting worse, Zelena had offered her guest bedroom to Killian who gratefully took the opportunity to avoid having to leave the shelter of their home while also getting the chance to plan thoroughly with both Alice and Robin. However, around mid afternoon as the thunder roared every few minutes, Robin could tell that Alice was uncomfortable and anxious but was trying to hide it in the company of her father. Robin decided to try wrap things up so that her and Alice could have some much needed alone time to allow Alice to process all the information, and give her the chance to relax despite the weather.

As Zelena excused herself to the small library turned office on the upper floor of her home and Killian, exhausted from both his wet travels that morning and the stressful event of planning their safe mission, decided he would take a nap before dinner and made his way to the guest bedroom.

“Oh my love, our beautiful Sunday of romance seems so far way now doesn’t it?” spoke Alice after a while. They were now in more comfortable nightgown attires, curled up on the large sofa in the living area facing the fire with a large woollen blanket wrapped around them both. With the crackling of the fire and Robin’s comforting body so close to hers, it was hard for Alice to be bothered by the weather too much anymore.

Robin hummed in a sad agreement as she kissed the top of Alice’s head, where it lay on her chest.

“Are you excited about our trip?” Robin asked curiously, turning her head forward to read Alice’s face. Her long wavy hair fell into Alice’s face as she did so, causing the other girl to laugh and move her head around.

“Not if I ave to deal with this every day, I swear that hair of yours was wrapped round me neck this morning”

Robin’s eyes lit up as she looked into Alice’s and laughed playfully, sticking her tongue out and saying “I’m not supposed to wear it down and loose, it interferes with my shooting and that…. I thought you liked my hair like this?” Robin spoke the last part softly, almost as if Alice was going to jump up and cut it all off.

“Oh Robs don’t look so sad, I love your hair any type of way, I was only joking!” she smiled and pushed the loose strand behind her loves ear, kissing her gently on the lips. “I don’t know why you get so self-conscious, everyone adores you, you’re so beautiful. So beautiful that Tommon the town idiot was asking for you yesterday”

Robin gave her a weird look that Alice interpreted to mean that she hadn’t got a notion who Tommon was.

“Tommon? The steel workers son? Why was he asking for me?” Robin asked in confusion as she began to play with Alice’s wild hair.

“He thinks your gorgeous like every other lad in this place, said he wanted to bring you for a walk.. reckon to ask your hand in marriage. He’s way too keen, he’s not even that good looking. But I do get his point, why on earth are you with a nutter like me and not a wealthy tradesman like him”

Robin looked at Alice for a moment as she comprehended everything she had said, wanting to choose her words carefully as a small hot pool of anger burned in the pit of her stomach.

“Did he say that to you? He called you a nutter?”

Alice grimaced but using her best dumb boy tommon voice repeated the words that he had spoken to her, “..and then I heard him call me loopy or something, they all love you and respect you so much around here Robin, you must be beyond embarrassed that people think I’m batshit”

“Don’t you ever say that!” Robin practically yelled, her face was heating up with the rage she felt at anyone making Alice feel such a way that she questioned why she was with her. “Don’t ever, you’re no more crazy than the man on the moon. You have an amazing, wonderful, intelligent mind. You have magic that you only use for good, you’ve had a really hard time in life. Don’t let some dirt bag like Tommon question your worth. I love you!” she finished proudly, kissing Alice hard, trying to make her point.

“I would never and never have been embarrassed by you, I’m so proud. I tell everyone I meet who my love is. I’m kinda obsessed with you” she smiled, squidging Alice’s lips between her hands. Alice pushed her hand away and laughed, kissing Robin yet again.

In the back of Robin’s mind, she made a vow to embarrass Tommon as soon as she got the chance. Alice had brushed it off as no big deal, but Robin knew her better than that.

They spent the rest of their time talking and laughing, discussing their mission ahead with Alice sharing all the best things to do in wonderland, and Robin trying to explain to Alice what a smartphone was “but why would anyone wanna look like a dog?” Alice had asked, disgusted, much to Robin’s amusement as she tried to explain face filters. The portals that needed some help were Wonderland, Modern Earth Society and The Roman Era. Naturally, Alice was very familiar with wonderland, even if she did not love the entirety of the place, and Robin was very familiar with modern earth, having lived there for a few years with her mother when she was a teenager because things weren’t very safe in her home realm. Neither of them had any experience with the roman era, but heard many stories about the fighting and craftsmanship along with all the information Killian had provided. Alice was excited to travel more, and Robin was excited to do just about anything with Alice. As they spoke the warmth from the fire made their minds hazy, and they drifted to sleep as the rain began to ease on the roof above, leaving soft rhythmical patterns that danced in Alice’s mind as Robin ran a gentle hand up and down her back.

Zelena had entered the room a good while later to ask the girls if they wanted something to eat, but where met with a snoring robin as Alice lay tucked on her chest, sound asleep, and decided to leave them be. Taking a mental image of how content they both were and going to wake Killian instead.

                                                                                 *********

Many engaging days had passed since the news, and it was now a busy bright Saturday morning in the village. Robin had the weekend off in preparation for their mission, but Alice had decided to work on Saturday as she normally would have, giving Mrs. B the day off for her understanding that Alice could no longer work with her over the next couple of months. Mrs. B would miss her of course, but would rather Alice live a fruitful life.

Robin approached the market strand of the village and spotted Alice as she was finishing up with a customer, her distinctive voice travelling far and wide. Alice always looked beautiful, but today she radiated more than the sun. She had left her hair natural today, clean and pin straight and was wearing one of her favourite white and blue gowns, despite the mud floor beneath her. She could see the twinkle in her eye all the way from down the lane, and her heart lurched with adoration.

“I tell you what Mary, I’ll give you two extra scones on credit for your sons, they are visiting today aren’t they?” Alice smiled down at a very old, feeble woman who smiled hugely beneath her scarf and wrapped slow arms around Alice. Robin could hear the woman’s reply as she approached.

“Oh…Dear! You remembered, I would love so very much to have something nice to give my boys, they work so hard. Last week I received a letter informing me that they would be visiting and promised I would save my coins for a beautiful supper, but the storm hit my farm very hard. My husband Is still there now, we lost a lot of chickens-“

“Which means you lost a lot of eggs” Alice nodded sadly. “Don’t worry okay, you’re a trusted customer” she spoke as she handed the woman the bag of scones and turned to take note on some parchment, mentally reminding herself to tell Mrs. B of the encounter.

“Any scones for me?” Robin asked mischievously, smirking through her hood. Recognising the voice immediately, Alice whipped her head around to find a smiling Robin who took off her hood to reveal her long hair, with half twisted into a small bun at the back of her head. “Ay my love! What has you out here? I thought you was restin?” she asked, but couldn’t hide the genuine smile plastered across her face.

“I missed you, and I’m hungry. Mother was making lamb stew and I couldn’t stand the smell” Robin noted with a disgusted face that made Alice laugh loudly, “I love your mothers Lamb stew, reckon she’d have me over for tea? There’ll be plenty there if you’re not eating any..”

Robin nodded, “Sure, I was hoping you would come back with me after work if you weren’t busy?” Alice smiled at Robin looking slightly nervous and said “of course dummy, even if I was busy I’d drop it for you- Actually while you’re here there’s this thing back ‘ere, like uh..like the nail has come loose, it caught on Mrs. B’s cloak yesterday and I said I’d have a look but you would know more than me..”

“Oh yeah let me have a look, I just have to drop a letter from Killian over to Billy from the team, I’ll be right back!” she exclaimed as she kissed Alice cutely on the lips and half jogged towards the end of the road.

Just as Alice was coming back around to the front of the stall, she seen Tommon coming her way. She glanced around to see if Robin had returned yet but much to her dismay Robin had disappeared from view. His boots sludged annoyingly in the wet mud as he approached, with his signature smirk in place.

“Hey To-“

“Shut it Loopy, I know the beauty is around, I seen her coming down earlier. Where is she?” Alice was taken aback by how aggressive he seemed this time and felt herself taking a few steps back, pushing her long hair behind her ears.

“Wow, bad day at the office?” she half laughed, trying to sound more confident than she felt as he lowered his face directly in front of hers, “Also, ever ‘eard of personal space? I could use some” and with that he spat at her feet, his playful smirk gone.

“Listen you ghastly little orphan, I’m under a lot of pressure here. That Robin will be married to me and that’s just the way things work in the real world. So just tell me which way she went and I will leave you alone”

“Fuck off man, get away from me and this stall, she’d never even look at you ya pompus prick”. Tommon gasped at her language and his friends laughed ignorantly as he grabbed the back of her head, holding a handful of her hair as he shoved her down hard into the wet mud.

Alice let out a squeal of surprise, trying desperately to claw at his hands and avoid a face full of muck, but she failed miserably.

“You’re one crazy little-“ he shouted angrily, but was cut off by a scream that erupted from the back of his throat. He looked down to see an arrow firmly placed through the front of his foot, holding him into the damp ground.

“CRAZY?” Robin yelled as she sprinted down the lane, sending an arrow into his right arm as she did so, extracting another roar from the tall boy. “Oh you have not seen crazy” she approached him and spat at his friends, her face red with anger. The people of the stalls gathered and surrounded the men as a husband and wife helped Alice to her feet.

“Just leave it robs its alright” Alice mumbled lowly, but Robin was already too far gone.

Pushing the arrow further into his arm Robin shouted “You fucking shrimp dick, you think you look good attacking a girl who is all alone? You think that makes you not-crazy? Bullying a pretty girl who sells bread? Are you feeling alright? are things not good at home?” she breathed, and dropped her voice low and menacing “Touch her, look at her, anything, ever again and I will send my arrow through your eye socket, you wont be much use as a steel man with one eye and one foot!” she added pointedly, shoving him back onto the ground and cherishing the way he screamed in pain as the arrow ripped out of his foot.

The people of the stalls comforted Alice, with one man leaning towards Robin saying ”You’re a little gem darling, he was a right pain in our arse every day”

As Tommon’s friends pulled him away, his cries of pain could be heard throughout the village. But nobody helped, simply turning a blind eye.

Her hair was covered in sticky mud, her dress was destroyed, but her resolve was not. Alice still smiled when Robin turned around, making Robin’s eyes water as she enveloped her in a tight hug.

“Are you alright? Did he hurt you much?” Robin asked worriedly, eyes scanning over Alice’s body, but Alice shrugged “Not as much as you hurt him my love” and with that Robin looked down towards the ground, she didn’t like that side of herself, even if it was called for.

 “Here” said Alice, “have a sweet bun before you pass out”, which caused Robin to laugh as people clapped her on the back and gave her nods of approval as they walked past.

“Here, I’ll fix that nail and close up, you go home and get washed. I’ll visit Mrs. Bigalow after too” Robin said, still not making eye contact with Alice. “Thank you my sweet bird” Alice smiled and kissed her cheek, that made Robin feel better, as Alice only called her that on special occasions.

“My knight in shining armour” She shouted over her shoulder as she walked towards her father’s camp, speaking to all the well wishers as she went.

                                                                          **********

Robin stared into her lamb stew, swirling the vegetables around and mushing the pieces together with the back of her spoon. Her mother looked at her suspiciously across the table as Alice chewed her meal hungrily, slurping massive spoonfuls and thanking her between each bite. Zelena was endeared by the girl, but couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

Knowing Robin would not open up if confronted, Zelena mentally decided not to poach the subject and spoke to Alice instead.

“How was work today Alice?” Zelena asked innocently. She noticed how Robin glanced up at her almost immediately, but Alice replied without missing a beat “Most of my morning was fine, the norm.” She answered quickly  and continued eating, side eying Robin awkwardly.

“Good, how was your day Robi-“ “Fine, mother.” Robin answered a little to quickly, earning a light elbow and raised eyebrow from Alice. “Okay..” Zelena replied cautiously, sensing Robin’s mood and deciding not to pry any further.

After dinner Alice had decided she would go stay with her Papa, considering her and Robin would soon be leaving together for many weeks. She gave Robin a passionate kiss at the door and thanked her for earlier, asking Robin to not worry, that she didn’t care if everyone thought she was crazy. Robin however, was upset entirely over the entire ordeal. Her mother entered her room later that night to find her sitting on her bed and fidgeting with her arrows.

Zelena crossed the room and knelt down in front of her daughter.

“Robin, are you going to tell me what’s wrong with you today?” She asked wearily, trying to meet her daughters eyes.

“Some dude called Alice crazy in front of everyone at the markets today” she announced tiredly. “I sorta shot him with my arrow…twice” she said after a long pause. Zelena sighed but didn’t try to discipline her, knowing it was no use as Robin was clearly already beating herself up about it. Instead she let her daughter talk.

“I’m not proud of my actions but that’s not what’s bothering me. He pushed her into the ground, he called her nuts. They all think she’s nuts when she’s not. She’s different sure but a good different and it’s so sad that not matter what she does she still gets treated this way. I can shoot anyone with an arrow but I don’t know how to truly make her feel better. I’m lost” she said quietly, holding back the urge to cry. Zelena rubbed her arms in comfort and chose her words carefully.

“Alice has a thicker skin than you think. That girl demolished three bowls of stew today and still had a smile on her face. She’s loopy but she’s intelligent, and you need to realise she’s not as soft as you think. She’s already over it. Don’t be so hard on yourself because she adores what you did. I could see it in her eyes today”

Robin smiled weakly, but decided not to contend with her mothers words, choosing to picture Alice’s smile instead.

“Get some rest, tomorrow promises to be a good day, it’s a Sunday! Take her somewhere she loves and meet us back her for dinner before Monday rolls around. Killian and I wish to say our goodbye before you embark on your journey. I love you dear” She said sweetly, kissing Robins forehead and leaving her to rest, with Robin calling an “I love you too mother” as she left. Tomorrow was a promising day, and Robin knew just what they both needed before they left the village on their mission.

 

 


	3. Wonderland: Part I

**Chapter 2: Wonderland part I**

“No, Alice, please please please pleas-“ Robin’s words were not so elegantly cut off as she landed with a large splash into the ice cold river. Her breath hitched in the back of her throat as her head was quickly submerged beneath the water, a deep chill seeping into her skin immediately. Not wanting to miss out on all the fun, she felt the water move beside her as Alice dived in head first, the cold a welcome relief from the heat of the beating mid-afternoon sun.

Robin quickly forced her head above the water, pushing her hair back while taking a large gulp of air.

When Alice re-appeared, she had to stop herself from staring. Robin looking breath taking. She moved backwards, almost floating with her head above water. The sun that escaped through the gaps of the large trees above radiated her face, leaving the rest of the river in a dark shade that gave the impression of heaven shining down, haloing her love. She looked so calm that Alice almost felt like she was intruding on an intimate moment. As if sensing Alice’s eyes on her skin, Robin peaked one eye open, turning her head slightly and murmured “You know, it’s rude to stare”, causing Alice to blush unwillingly.

“I’m not staring, I’m admiring. Plus you’re my love, I’m allowed to stare” she winked cheekily, treading the water lightly to where Robin was, finding herself being star struck yet again as the sun pierced through Robin’s green eyes.

Robin on the other hand had not forgotten how she had ended up in this predicament and lured Alice into a false sense of security, leaning towards her as if to give her a sweet kiss but instead kicking Alice’s feet out from under her, laughing as she squealed before being dunked beneath the clear water of the river.

“I guess I deserved that” Alice gasped as she wiped the water from her eyes, smiling before leaning in to give Robin an actual kiss.

The river was long but shallow and ran through most of the forest. It led to a large lake opening at the edge of town that was used for fishing and swimming during the warmer summer season. When Robin had taken Alice to the secluded area of the riverbank earlier that morning, she had been nervous, aware of her girlfriends inability to swim. She was deathly afraid of offending Alice, but Alice looked so delighted at the prospect of jumping into the water with Robin and never hesitated once. That was a highly redeemable quality that Alice possessed, she was fearless and entirely too brave all while looking like the cutest person on the planet.

Suspecting that Robin was running wild in her own mind again, Alice splashed some water in Robins direction, laughing loudly at the shocked expression that passed over Robin’s beautiful features.

“What’s the matter Robs? You’re already wet”

“Not the kind of wet I’d like to be, that’s for sure” Robin muttered, enjoy the satisfaction of watching Alice’s face grow hot.

“Yeah well thanks to my father I don’t think I’ll ever be able to sleep with you again, that’s scarred me for life that” Alice announced, staring into the water and picking apart a small leaf that had floated into her company.

“Oh god, please don’t. I almost flung you out the door” Robin replied, earning a snort from Alice.

A few swimming lessons and some pre-packed marmalade sandwiches later, Robin and Alice lay side by side on the riverbank allowing the last of the sun’s rays to dry them off. They were silent for a while before Alice spoke, but Robin noticed the hesitancy in every word, as if she was choosing exactly what to say. As if she was nervous to say it at all.

“Robin, can I tell you something?”

“Of course”

“I don’t like it when people I don’t know call me crazy. I don’t mean like Tommon did, he’s mean to everyone really, I mean when people talk about me. Even though it’s mostly good people and they may be saying nice things, they just always have to mention how I’ve a screw loose. And I get it. I do think a bit weirdly sometimes, but I was trapped for most of my life, my best friend was a hat and a stuffed rabbit, it’s gods luck I’ve any sanity left all” She finished, sitting up and picking at some blades of grass.

“And then I was chucked into wonderland, you’d really go bonkers in there lemme tell ya, you’ll soon see”

She squinted up at the sun, her damp hair cascading down her back. Robin sat up beside her, moving so that she was facing across from Alice, holding both of her hands in her own as she spoke.

“What you’re feeling is entirely understandable, but you shouldn’t let what people say affect you. They don’t know you well enough to make their judgements, but they do it anyway. You have the most beautiful mind and I would never want you to change. You’re more brilliant and exciting than everyone here, they don’t know what to make of you. Any foreign entity is wild or crazy to them. Two weeks ago, I brought up the idea of creating steel tipped arrows and the carpenter called me a witch, they can be small minded for people who live among portals and fairy tales” Robin laughed, kissing Alice softly.

Robin was mildly surprised at how open Alice had become of her own will but it made her heart soar knowing that she was the only person in all the realms that got to experience this side of her.

“Don’t ever doubt yourself, I love you” Robin whispered, kissing Alice’s blushing cheek.

“Not as much as I love you” replied Alice, never getting used to hearing Robin tell her that. She didn’t say It often but when she did it made Alice feel as though she had grown wings and flown up into the clouds.

“Are clouds made of marshmallows dya reckon?” she randomly blurted, eliciting a large laugh from the other girl as she raised her head towards the cloudless sky.

“I’m not sure, if I ever get up there one day I’ll let you know. Now come on, mother’s probably waiting to boil us in the pot for being late”

“And my father’s probably eaten all of the food already” Alice noted with an eye roll.

Quickly dressing and packing up their belongings, including Robins bow and arrows, something she refused to leave the house without, they made their way from the mossy riverbank over the daisy ridden hill where Robin’s cottage resided. Hand in hand, as an orange hue filled the air around them with the oncoming sunset.

************

“I know, we’re sorry” Robin announced as she pulled Alice into the house, taking off their boots just inside the front door and going to sit by the open fire in the kitchen.

“We thought you’d started you’re journey early, you sure you didn’t fall down that rabbit hole Alice?” Killian asked, raising an eyebrow as he took a seat at the large table and began aggressively spooning large servings of vegetables onto his plate.

“It’s not hard to see where Alice gets her appetite from” Zelena remarked as she placed a bowl of fried potatoes onto to the table, giving Killian an incredulous look as he grabbed the bowl almost immediately.

“Ooooh roast potata’s! My favourite, give it here Papa I love the crispy ones”

“Hold on would you Alice I was here first”

Zelena and Robin shared a look as they followed suit and took a seat at the table, plating their own food as everyone began talking about what they had done with their Sunday afternoon. It was Alice who announced she had brought an Apple pie curtesy of Mrs. B, which brought a massive cheer from everyone in the cottage, especially Robin who was the owner of a huge sweet tooth. Alice had caught her eating a jam tartlet on her way home one day and wouldn’t let her live it down.

After dinner Zelena had brought Killian out to the farm sheds across the field in order to help fix an old gate lock, with Zelena remarking that Killian’s hook would come in useful against the steel railings. Alice watched them walk across the grass from the kitchen window where she stood washing the dishes, a lantern hanging from Kilian’s hook as the darkness grew upon them.

She was so lost in thought as she scrubbed that she jumped slightly at the feel of Robin’s arms when they snaked around her waist from behind. Robin placed her head on Alice’s shoulder and moved her hair to one side as she lovingly peppered her neck with soft kisses, trailing all the way to her cheek. Alice turned to face her and kissed her hard, feeling Robin smile against her lips.

“How long does it take two parents to fix a gate?” Alice asked in mock seriousness, pulling Robin in for a long kiss. She noted how Robin was half dressed, with her hunting vest and loose shirt exposing some of her collarbone - Alice had to physically stop herself from drooling.

“Ugh, clearly not that long, I can see them on their way back now” Robin said with a sigh, nodding towards the window where the low beam of the lantern could be seen in the not so distant distance.

Wrapping her arms around Robins neck, Alice kissed her once again, cherishing the feeling she got every time Robin so even much as looked in her direction. She pulled back briskly however, as neither girl wanted a repeat of that dreaded morning.

Soon enough Killian and Zelena had re-entered the cottage, and everyone had said their goodbyes, with Alice and Robin saying much longer goodbye than necessary which earned a sarcastic cough from Killian.

“I’ll see you tomorrow for our big adventure” Robin whispered as she hugged Alice just a moment longer, earning a cute giggle and kiss from an over excited Alice. Indeed their mission had approached quickly, but the matter was urgent and both girls were prepared. Robin had knowledge of every aspect of portals and their plan to ease the issues at hand, while Alice had practiced her magic and extended her energy, meaning she could complete more complex tasks like shrinking their supplies so that they fit in their pockets, or escaping spells for safety precautions. They were excited and anxious, but one thing was definite, it was bound to be one wild ride.

**********

The whole town had gathered around, many abandoning their stalls to catch a glimpse of the excitement. Even Tommon and his gang of gorillas could be seen lurking in the background, curiosity clearly being stronger than pride.

Eager to get a move on before he changed his mind entirely about the whole ordeal, Killian announced the departure of the beloved couple and waited calmly as people wished them well and asked them to be safe and to get the job done as soon as they possibly could. Villagers with families in different realms gave them their personal gratitude and said they truly hoped the problem could be resolved and they would face no true dangers.

Thanking everyone who had gathered, the couple made their way into the rose garden, a very accessible area for portal transportation. With one final hug to both of their parents, Alice disappeared behind a large oak tree before grabbing Robin and thrusting her harshly down the deep rabbit hole. Keeping a tight grip of Robin’s hand as she slid down herself.

Robin could barely resist the urge to scream as her world turned completely black. She felt a wave of nausea and panic as she her unprepared body was pulled roughly in all directions. In fact, if Alice hadn’t held a death grip on her right hand, Robin could have sworn she had disappeared entirely from the earth as she began to imagine that she was floating through space. Her grand tour de universe was cut short however as she was chucked into a bright light, falling awkwardly onto a bed of what appeared to be grass with Alice sliding cheerily down on top of her.

Standing up with a massive grin and a wild look in her eyes, Alice glanced around all angles trying to decipher which end was up and what end was down. Laughing in an odd manner, she looked to her left and dragged Robin up, pulling her towards a clearance through the trees. If Robin hadn’t known any better she could have sworn that she was exactly where she was before Alice had pulled her through that dreaded hole in the ground.

“Alice, hold on! Wait up, I can’t even see anything right now” Robin cried, stumbling over her own two feet, “I feel like I’m gonna” was all she managed to say before was keeled over on all fours, gagging and spluttering onto the straw like grass, the entire contents of her breakfast laid out in a disgusting lumpy puddle.

“Oh good lord, what the hells the matter?” Alice asked, kneeling down beside her and handing her a flask of water.

“It takes a while to get used to this place, and that wasn’t the smoothest journey I’ve ever had neither, think it was a bit pissed that I was bringing in a non-magic intruder” she laughed, but rubbed Robins back soothingly. Her eyebrows were knotted in concern.

“Lets just get a move on” Robin gasped, swallowing massive gulps of water and standing abruptly, requesting Alice lead the way.

As they approached the opening they realised one of two things very quickly.

  1. The ground had become entirely too spongy
  2. There was an overwhelming scent of …..chocolate



Stuck for words, Robin opened and closed her mouth curiously, resembling a small pond fish as she tried to understand where on earth she was. Having never visited wonderland she expected to be bewildered at every turn, but even Alice looked lost for an explanation.

“Must be a knew turn, I’ve never had such a strong hunger in all my life.” Alice noted with a distant look in her eye. Then much to Robin’s absolute horror she watched as Alice crouched to the ground, grabbing a large bunch of flowers from the earth and shoving them into her mouth. Barely even stopping to chew, she ran over the nearest tree while opening her mouth wide and taking a massive bite from a lingering branch.

“ALICE? What are you doing?!” Robin yelled uselessly as she sprinted towards her love, half tackling her to the ground, acutely missing a small forest pond as she squeezed her face, begging her to spit it out.

“But I’m so hungry” Alice whimpered, and suddenly Robin felt the urge to lower herself into the pond and drink the entire contents until her tongue was raw. She had such an insatiable thirst for whatever lay beyond that she subconsciously held a hand up to her throat, becoming unable to speak at the wild scratchy feeling that was beginning to develop.

Alice noticed the look in Robin’s eye as she stared hungrily at the pond and came quickly to her senses. She grabbed Robins wrist before the girl decided to go for a swim and whispered slowly:

_“It’s not my magic nor my might,_

_That tries to keep me up at night,_

_If I can’t control my own free will and mind,_

_Then my actions are open for anyone to find._

_I am stronger than you think._

_So please allow my soul to drink”_

Robin was so entirely caught off guard by Alice’s rehearsed outburst that she almost missed the small glass jar that fell from the sky, landing on the grass beside them both. Alice grabbed it quickly and popped the cork, taking a mouthful before passing it to Robin, who read the label ‘drink me’ just as Alice spoke.

 “Drink it now Robs, I told you this was a funny old place, thank god I know this place pretty well or you’d be neck deep in that pond by now and I’d be eating the shrubbery.”

Robin drank the strange colourless liquid as Alice spoke, and giggled at her rambling.

“We’re in a land of edible ….well, everything. When you first arrive here they tend to test your magic, or your strength. The weak will be under control the whole time, much like we just were love. It’s a silly place, bonkers. But we’re fine cause my magic is just about strong enough”

Robin nodded up at her girlfriend who was now trying to clean edible dirt from her nose. She smiled to herself, taking a moment to be totally in love with the cute little magic girl in front of her.

As they both stood and walked ahead, Alice pulled out her map of wonderland which was something Killian had given to her in secret. It was protected by magic so that only Alice could open it and view the contents. The contents however, were ever changing, with only one main area ever staying the same. Said area was the location where the portal would lead to, but there was no direct route at the moment so both girls decided to follow intuition with Alice promising to keep up with the map as much as she could.

*****

As the girls walked further through the trees, Robin gathered a deep queasy feeling in her stomach as she felt the floor sink beneath her. The air was once again filled with aroma of chocolate and Alice was quick to notice that they had been sneakily directed to an area accompanied by food. Massive chunks of food.

“Wow…” Robin muttered dreamy eyed, “we’re standing on marshmallows right now, and oh my god a hot chocolate lake! Look Alice, popcorn trees! This is literally Charlie and the chocolate factory and I’m Charlie!” Robin squealed as she ran around, smelling everything hungrily and beaming like a kid in a literal candy store.

‘Who in the blazes is Charlie?’ Alice asked herself as she walked across the marshmallow path, trying to keep an eye on both her over-excited sugar loving girlfriend and the map of wonderland which sat between her hands.

Alice laughed when Robin had gone quiet, as Robin was now sitting down on a baby marshmallow, trying to figure out the flavour of a gummy bear by scent and colour alone.

“Ya know” began Alice, earning a wide-eyed look from Robin who looked like she had just been caught trying to steal a cookie from her mother’s favourite biscuit tin, “You can actually eat the food” she finished, chewing on a piece of red liquorice.

This was clearly a mind-blowing revelation to Robin, who’s jaw had dropped considerably.

“Okay I know we have a big mission thing so I’ll just have a few gummy bears, ooooh and maybe some of those chocolate flowers” she spoke as she wandered through the massive forest made of sweetness. Alice knew that sugar was Robin’s one true weakness and so she rolled her eyes at wonderland’s ability to know just how to mess perfectly with everyone that entered.

Many treats and a confused map later, they neared the end of the marshmallow pathway. They were immediately faced with a cross roads that featured two massive red sign posts, one arrow had ‘tomorrow’ written on it while the other noted ‘yesterday’ in bold white writing.

Robin was practically buzzing from the sugar that coursed through her unexpecting body and Alice had to tell her to sit down for a moment while she read the map, sighing when she realised what the riddle of a cross roads meant.

“It’s the only way to get to the other side of wonderland, think of it like a bridge of sorts”

Coming down from her gummy bear induced high, Robin nodded slowly and kissed Alice lovingly on the cheek in an effort to cheer the girl up.

“Something tells me this isn’t going to be a very ordinary bridge” Robin questioned, raising one perfectly arched eyebrow at Alice.

“No my love, nothing here is ordinary. It’s a sort of spiral vortex, you could end up stuck in there for months if you’re not careful, I’m not sure my magic is strong enough if we get in any sort of danger”

Robin considered Alice’s words for a moment as she spun in a slow circle, noting a clearing down a stone made lane to the right. It looked like a regular wooded area.

“Hey, how about we go down that direction and set up camp for the night. This has been a lot already and I don’t want you doing anything you’re not comfortable with just yet. If that bridge way is our best option and you want to be strong then it’s best to be well rested and prepared.”

Alice nodded and smiled sheepishly, “You really are the most intelligent girl in all the realms”

“But you my dear, are the bravest” Robin said as she kissed her nose softly.

“the most beautiful” another kiss to her forehead.

“And the most unique” with a final kiss on the lips, earning a shy smile from the magic girl.

“Alright then, lets set up camp, I’m starving”

“Not sure I can say the same” Robin added, suddenly looking like she was about to hurl up the contents of her stomach yet again.

“You really are a big child, ya know that Robs, no self-restraint in a world of candy and heart attack inducing sugar quantities”

“Maybe, but I am highly skilled in archery and combat so watch what you say”

Alice laughed as they walked hand in hand towards the forest clearing.

******

One thing to remember about Wonderland, was that time passed differently there. This was a concept Robin struggled with. She was a woman who loved the unknown, but loved structure just a tad bit more. Alice had fallen asleep beside the fire Robin had built for them, but Robin was wide awake.

The moment they had decided to set up camp and call it quits for the night the forest that they moved towards immediately grew dark, earning no reaction from a clearly overly comfortable Alice. Robin just couldn’t understand such a place. She couldn’t fathom whether it was a world of amazement or terror. She currently felt both.

She watched Alice sleep soundly for a while, her face looking like the poster child for innocence as she slept with only the soft orange shadows of the fire dancing among her features. Alice was always a curious girl, but Robin was always interested. Killian was right, they balanced each other out.

Without any physical indication, not even opening an eye to peak, Alice spoke in a deep husky tone, “Are you going to stare at me like a creep all night or are you going to lie down?” she asked, not moving an inch from where she lay. There tent was arranged just a few metres away, but Alice didn’t mind being outside for now.

“Sorry my love, I can’t sleep”

Alice awoke slowly, moving around on her blanket so that she was sitting upright, her legs folded in front of her.

“It’s probably all that sugar running through your veins” Alice laughed but took on a serious note soon after.

“It takes a bit of getting used to down here I know, I can charm you into slumber if you’d like?” Alice offered, looking more tired than Robin had ever seen her before. As if on queue Alice yawned widely, stretching her arms over her head as she did so.

“No thanks” Robin mumbled as she made her way towards the tent.

“Are you coming in here? I don’t trust being outside while I sleep in a foreign land”

Alice smiled up at her, gratefully accepting Robins outstretched hand as she helped her to her feet. As Robin pulled her up, Alice slammed her head into her chest and wrapped her hands around the taller girl’s waist, squeezing tightly.

“I was so scared last time I was ‘ere, you don’t know what it means to have you by my side. I’m so sorry you’re not coping well”

Robin was so endeared, she hugged Alice back. Only being minimally taller than her girlfriend, Robin could comfortably rest her chin on Alice’s head, stroking soft patterns into her hair. So soft in fact, that Alice began to sway with tiredness as she clung to Robin’s body.

“I think it’s time for bed now” Robin laughed as she guided Alice towards the tent. Both girls collapsed onto the makeshift bed of blankets, still clad in their day time clothes.

“I love you” Alice mumbled as she drifted to sleep slowly. Head on Robin’s chest.

“I love you more” Robin replied, but could already hear her tired girlfriends soft snores as she too finally drifted to sleep.

********

“What the fuck is thaaaat?? what the fuck?! WHAT -AH!” Robin shot up off the ground, her hand immediately finding it’s home on her bow as she had an arrow ready to launch within half a second. Alice looked both shocked and impressed as she held her arms up in surrender.

“Calm Robin, it’s not a bear!”

“What the hell are you screaming about?” Robin shouted incredulously, arrow still pointing around the room comically.

She got her answer in the form of a large squirrel, which quickly darted up her leg under her shirt and sat close to her chin. Robin screamed hysterically, flailing about as Alice danced around the tent with her hands above her head, trying to avoid Robin’s cocked arrow.

“Robin it’s just a squirrel or something will you please put that damn arrow down, you’re gonna take me eye out!”

Robin dropped her weapon and ran out of the tent, shimmying her body as she did so - clearly trying to rid herself of the small furry intruder that had already been scared off by the girls antics.

“Listen tower girl, you ever wake me up like that again when something isn’t seriously wrong and I will see to it that there IS something seriously wrong!”

Alice grimaced but attempted a weak smile, “I’m so sorry my love, It ran across my face. I didn’t bloody know what it was myself”

Robin stared at her girlfriend for a moment before breaking into a wide grin, a grin that caused Alice to laugh, which caused Robin to snort, causing both girls to laugh even more.

“Come on you moron let’s get packed up, I want to get the hell out of here as soon as possible. I have an uneasy feeling”

Alice agreed, and with a quick shake of magic to shrink the content they owned, fitting them into their respective pockets they began to walk back to where they had left off yesterday, only to find that the signposts had gone, but the cross roads remained.

“Hm.” Alice noted, taking out her map, “that’s strange, typically areas don’t change once you’ve seen them once. It really can’t be much of a good thing”

She finished speaking and squinted against the light, looking deeply into the parchment before glancing up at the crossroads again. After turning the map left right and inside out she seemed to finally come to a conclusion.

“Ah you see” but her sentence stopped short as she stared straight ahead.  A dazed look crossed her eyes as they watered slightly.

Robin opened her mouth to ask what was the matter, when she felt the ground vanish from beneath her feet. She fell several metres before continuing to fall. It was like she was flying or going on a very weird slide. Swirls of black and white surrounded every aspect of her space. She tried to call for Alice but her mouth wouldn’t open and she suddenly felt like she had never taken a drink of water in her entire life. As her spiral through became longer, she was able to calm herself down enough to think. This is obviously the spiral vortex Alice was talking about she had thought to herself, giving her the slightest sense of relief that at least they had the right area. Being too confused to think much further, she was grateful when all the spinning came to a stop and she was left lying on the opposite side of a large bridge. A literal bridge this time. But Alice was nowhere to be seen.

“Alice? Alice!” she called out as her eyes adjusted to the scene. The sky was a dark blue, with just enough light to let her know it wasn’t the middle of the night. The bridge was made of stone, and had large steel railings painted in an off-putting bright red. The water below was wild, it looked like a river yet it crashed high and low menacingly biting at the riverbank like a stormy ocean. Confused and worried, she called Alice’s name once again as the one she spoke of appeared from behind her.

Filled with an overwhelming sense of relief upon seeing Alice with her wild hair and gown, she didn’t notice the vacant look in Alice’s eyes, nor the way her girlfriend had not yet reacted to finding Robin again.

Kissing her on the cheek, Robin held both of Alice’s upper arms as she suddenly became very aware that she was totally unresponsive. But before she got the chance to say any more, Alice jutted her hand out harshly, sending a beam of energy through the air.

The energy was so powerful that it shot Robin backwards, she landed on the stone ground just in front of the bridge with a tough thump. Alice stood above her and her face was just close enough for Robin to see the faded spirals of black and white dance behind her eyes.

Robin sat up and drew her arrow quickly, after all, this could be a shapeshifter, or an impersonator. All Robin knew was that Alice would never harm her intentionally.

“Alice stop, it’s me, it’s me!”

Robin was a smart girl. She read enough about curses and spells and those who cast them to know that Alice was in some sort of trance, or worse, under someone else’s spell.

Alice pushed her forward as Robin stumbled backwards across the bridge. As Alice raised her hand, Robin drew her arrow.

“Stay back” she growled. She couldn’t help the hurt that leaked into her voice. She didn’t sound like the confident girl she normally would be. The wind then picked up considerably, her hair whipped at her face as she stumbled backwards, looking Alice directly in the eyes in hoping she would gain some recognition. But it never came.

Instead, she was propelled backwards by another lash of Alice’s energy. The clouds grew dark and heavy in the darkening sky and Robin was doing everything to both keep her composure and try to awaken Alice. However, with Alice’s second outburst Robin was thrown rapidly across the bridge. Instead of colliding with the rough stone ground, she was met with a slick metal landing.

She felt a dart of pain through her ribs and winced, watching as Alice fell to the floor halfway across the bridge. Two large metal arms engulfed her body and she watched as a large steel cladded soldier wrapped his arms around Alice. Putting two and two together, Robin figured they had now been held by some form of bridge security. It didn’t explain much though, for a start what the hell had just happened to Alice. And what exactly had they done wrong?

As the wind picked up she had no time to think anymore about it, with both her and an unconscious Alice being escorted back towards a large stone built tower that sat just beyond the bridge. It was mostly covered by the foliage, not being the largest nor tallest building she had ever experienced. It could almost be considered pretty in the right lighting, but she wasn’t exactly sure she wanted to test out the interior. Unfortunately, it seemed like they hadn’t really got a choice.

 Taking them inside the cold tower and moving down one set of crumbling steps, (35 crumbling steps to be exact, Robin counted) They were both thrown unceremoniously into a large stone room that held one fire in the centre. It had no windows, and the floor was covered in spikes of hay and wet mud. There was a single bucket in the corner, and Robin could only presume what that was for. Wonderland clearly didn’t have very high hygiene standards, she thought momentarily.

Before the large welded figures left, she called out through the bars featured on the small opening of the stone door that they had just so rudely shut in her face. One figure turned around, eliciting a screech of rusted metal as they did so.

“What’s going on here? Why in all the realms are we locked in this …cell?”

“You trespassed our bridged land using violent magic. You have also trespassed our bridged land in possession of a weapon. This must not be tolerated. We will bring you bread and water in the morning. Your partners violent magic has created a storm from the vortex. When that is cleared, we will have your hearing. Goodbye”

The figures tone was incredibly deep, with an almost robotic sound. It gave Robin the chills. But not being one to be easily intimidated, she yelled out again. Nobody acknowledged her cries this time.

Becoming agitated already and not having the patience to wait for her psycho hypnotised girlfriend to wake up, she crossed the room to where Alice was laying on a stack of hay and began shaking her violently.

“Alice, get up now!” she whispered aggressively.

Alice’s eyes shot open and for half a second Robin was afraid she was still under a spell, but by the very creative use of words that came pouring out of Alice’s mouth she knew it was her love.

“My head is pounding, add that to list of the most shit sleeps ever. I had this crazy nightmare where I-Hold on, where the fuck are we?”

“I haven’t really got time to explain my dear but we’re under time pressure, you went all evil on me and now we’re on some sort of lock down by the ….security?” She questioned.

“I hate that stupid vortex, it never ends well. Don’t mind those guys they’re just like bouncers for the bridge, they wouldn’t ‘urt a fly”

“As amazing as that is we’re locked in THE FUCKING BASEMENT OF A TOWER” Robin seethed, whisper shouting at Alice who’s eyes widened considerably.

“Jesus Christ I’m always in one end of a blooming tower aren’t I?”

Robin would have laughed if she hadn’t lost her nerve, her anxiety growing with every second.

“Can you magic us the hell out of here please, I don’t care where. But we will never make it across to fix that portal if we get kicked out of wonderland for having a scrap on a bridge!”

“All right my dear loosen your knickers, grab my hand, I’ve been practicing one special for an occasion like this” Alice spoke proudly, smiling as she took both of Robin’s hands in hers and whispered something unintelligible under her breath.

***********************

A loud buzzer sounded, followed by the clanking of metal on metal.

“Alright ladies, out, spot check”

Alice groaned and mumbled five more minutes before an ‘ouch’ could be heard through the noise. As Robin slowly came around, she could smell rust and urine, followed by a rustling chatter that reminded her of a shopping mall she visited in Modern Earth when she was younger. Her mother had taken her on her 16th birthday as a surprise. Zelena had been obsessed with shoes and dresses and manicures, but Robin was all about the large tub of ice cream she got to eat after. It was this thought that lingered in her mind as she opened her eyes.

“LADIES! I SAID OUT, NOW!”

Confused but obedient Robin rolled out of bed which was, much to her surprise, pretty high off of the ground. She landed with an awkward thud and groaned as a pair of thick arms lifted her and placed her outside of the room.

Alice was already outside, chewing her nails anxiously. She continuously mumbled under her breath and as Robin focused on her, she noticed she was wearing an all in one suit, a bright orange all in one suit in fact. With steel handcuffs to match.

Once Robin had made eye contact with Alice and read her expression, she immediately knew they were in trouble.

“All clear, back in your cell ladies. And no recess for either of you for your tardiness”

They were shoved back into their room consisting of a cheap steel bunk bed, a toilet that looked like it carried more diseases than that of a street rat, and a sink with a warped plastic mirror.

“Um, Robin…I seem to have made a mistake”

Robin threw her head back and resisted the urge to scream, as Alice had only gone and transported them to a modern society prison.

“We’re fucked” Robin announced, looking at Alice who was now playing with a tube of toothpaste.

“Look at this robs, it comes out like a worm” she almost giggled, a shocked expression on her face.

Yep, they were well and truly fucked.

 

 

 

 


End file.
